~Somewhere, only I know~

~SOWK~

no@spam.com (Seleny...Angel) — Fri, 10 Apr 2009 22:44:32 GMT

I don't care.
I needed these bright colours.
I needed to feel this spring.
I don't care.
Everything's gonna be ok.
I know this. Yeah, we do.
Now I'm even more sensitive than ever.
I don't know why.
And I cried after seeing that movie.
Yes, I did.
And I'm OK.
Yes, I am.
Probably, there's smth wrong with me.
But...
I don't care.
=)
Mood: Sleepy
Music: Background
I want: Ice Cream
Categories: About nothing, Forget it, Future, Sleeplessness, Somewhere only we know

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I wish...

no@spam.com (Seleny...Angel) — Wed, 18 Mar 2009 14:21:31 GMT

When I understand that I can�t cope with my sadness and tears any longer, I�m afraid of being so weak. And the weather is with me. Something looks like rain and then snow and then rain again. The phrase of the week �I wish�� with such a deep sense for me. And when the arm-chair in the corner of the room is empty you finally realize that now you want to turn off the computer and try not to cry. Try to be serious and interested in something else. But I can�t!!!! I hate, when I can�t help people. I blame myself in everything. I know, it�s wrong, but I can�t change myself. Please, stop it and help us� Thought about our encouraging talks stifle me. We know what is going to happen. And we can�t change this� Please, help..!
Mood: Awful
Music: Background
I want: to open my eyes and to understand that it's just a dream.
Categories: Awful(((, Future, Questions, [...Feelings amd emotions...], [fuck]

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Huh?

no@spam.com (Seleny...Angel) — Sun, 08 Mar 2009 10:24:11 GMT

Mmm, do you know what impresses me most? The fact, that guys are so damm shocked, when you tell them, that you like playing races xDDD Why do you think, that we have to be weak all the time? Why can�t a girl be fond of playing NFS? xDDD Why Audi can�t be my favourite car? Why don�t you believe, that my favourite colors are grey and black? xDDD Why can�t you understand, that we are different and individual?))

Mood: Feel like dancing
Music: DJ Rostova
I want: to change the weather
Categories: Questions, {-Bo-o-oring-}

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I know...)

no@spam.com (Seleny...Angel) — Thu, 05 Mar 2009 21:50:06 GMT

When the Moon is high in the dark sky, I know, that you are looking at it too...
And it's soooo cool to know this..=)
And despite everything I know, that one day everything will be ok..))
I know, that each of us will be happy..))
Mood: unknown
Music: silence
I want: Mmmm
Categories: Future, My life, Somewhere only we know

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What a nice day!

no@spam.com (Seleny...Angel) — Sat, 21 Feb 2009 19:34:39 GMT

Happy Birthday to me?
Yeah! xDDDD

Mood: Cooooooooooooool
Music: Smth xDDD
I want: to keep having fun
Categories: Crazy!!!, Happy!, Holidays, Yahoo!!!

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Everytime

no@spam.com (Seleny...Angel) — Sat, 14 Feb 2009 19:56:29 GMT

It's never too late to say a simple phrase
"I love you"
Don't be afraid of saying it!=)
Happy St. Valentine Day!=)

The End
Happy End
=)

Mood: Nice
Music: Coldplay - Viva la vida
I want: Everybody to smile and to be happy)))
Categories: Happy!, Holidays, Yahoo!!!

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Stop it...

no@spam.com (Seleny...Angel) — Fri, 13 Feb 2009 20:49:51 GMT

Ah, OMG, how much it hurts!
I can�t stand it anymore!
I�m tired of this heartache and tears everyday�
I just want to become invisible!
I want to walk around the town, to be.
There�s smth inside of me and it�s eating me!
You think that you deserve this pain, but you don�t!!!
Can you hear me??????
You don�t!!!!
And this is not your fault.
This is not how everything supposes to be..!!!
I have no strength to scream, to cry or whatever�
I try to convince myself, saying that �Tomorrow gonna be alright�, but I realize that it�ll never happen.
But still, shit, I keep saying this!!!
Loud music - I have no voice�
�Keep on dreaming�, Ha!!!
I�m so naive!!!
It occurs�
I need support� I need help� I�m weak�
I can do nothing!!!
OMG� This stupid heartache again�
We are connected� I felt so bad today.
And here we go: one word - �awful�.
I need to take some pills�
I�m worrying, yes, I am�
�If you want to get out alive, run for your life.�
�Feeble�

Mood: Tears
Music: TDG - home
I want: I want everyting to be ok...
Categories: Awful(((, My life, SOS!!!!, [fuck], Questions

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A night sky..?

no@spam.com (Seleny...Angel) — Sun, 01 Feb 2009 14:58:45 GMT

Do you know that there are some moments in our life, when we�re sick and tired of everything..!
When you realize that it�s better not to turn on your computer, because there are some things that are very difficult to control. But, in spite everything, you push the button on this stupid machine, open a web-site and read those topics that are better to be untold. It�s so strange� I tried to run from this reality, now I�m running from another one, virtual. Where am I running?.. Problems are everywhere..! And when you try to get rid of them perhaps for 1 day and 1 night, you can�t! They find every convenient way to get into your head and to eat you from inside... But, all these troubles, they we�ll be always in this world. And our task is to overcome them and not to fall down. But let it be, as it is now.
February is truly my month� The last one� Smth between cold and warm�

Mood: bad
Music: Army - rain
I want: I don't know
Categories: About nothing, Forget it, Future, Questions, [fuck]

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Whoa

no@spam.com (Seleny...Angel) — Mon, 19 Jan 2009 15:42:37 GMT

Shit, stop lying, please!
We are so nervous now..!
Where are you now? What�re you doing? Is everything alright with you..?
Now I really want to have wings and to fly to all of you, guys�
What�s wrong with us?
Now I really want to do my best to help you, but I realize that I can do nothing�
Every night I toss in my bed and don�t have a wink of sleep�

Hm, and do you know what?..
Only now I�ve understood, that 1 year ago I came to this site�

Mood: Out
Music: Paramore
I want: To be sure, that everything is ok with my friends...
Categories: Awful(((, My life, Questions, [fuck]

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....

no@spam.com (Seleny...Angel) — Fri, 09 Jan 2009 20:59:46 GMT

Cold...
A cold, freazing wind from the opened window...
Wet hair and skin, smells like a cup of coffee...)
This odor filled the whole room...
I miss my friends...
How are they now?..
This the worts thing of making friends through the Internet:
You love them so much!!!, but you can't help them...
And they know everything about you: all your dreams, they just smile and don't say, that they are stupid or impossible
Now YOU know nothing about me...
Those stupid pages of this blog mixed up in your head and you can't understand it...
Maybe, one day, you'll know more about me, but not today, 'cause...))
Mood: Went out
Music: I'll stand by you
I want: To become an angel and to fly to my friends
Categories: About nothing, [...Feelings amd emotions...], Somewhere only we know, Night Thougths, My thoughts...

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Yellow?Pink?Blue?..

no@spam.com (Seleny...Angel) — Fri, 09 Jan 2009 08:02:54 GMT

Huh, honey, why have you done it?=))
Yeah, it�s easy to drink 4 cups of coffee at night, but what for?))
To get sleeplessness?.. Ah, you don�t need this)
You know, idioms are quite interesting�
I spent the whole night for learning them))
And the USA, GB, Canada, Australia� and UA � soooo boring�)))
But what can I do with this?
Right � nothing!
I don't like to write big and long topiocs here...
I don�t know why�
Lately my blog�s become so stupid and boring�)
But who cares?
I usually write here everything, that somehow have got into my head�)
And the white snow kept falling down..)

Mood: Sweet
Music: Anna Sedakova - My heart
I want: Nothing...
Categories: About nothing, Forget it

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A broken promise?..)))

no@spam.com (Seleny...Angel) — Thu, 08 Jan 2009 00:10:15 GMT

Why do candles die so quickly?..
Why do they live such a short life?..
Hm, now it's about 2 a.m. and I'm sitting in my room and looking at this blue candle..
It's melting and its blue blood slowly runs down to the table...
I promise, that tomorrow I'll start studying topics... Yeah, I promised it to myself...
Hm, let's see, what I'll get..))
Mood: So so
Music: Silence
I want: To fall asleep
Categories: About nothing, Wish me luck, Sleeplessness, Night Thougths, Forget it

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Cold fingers...

no@spam.com (Seleny...Angel) — Mon, 05 Jan 2009 21:25:22 GMT

I've changed my design... Now it looks so dark...But I like it..)))
Hm, a candle at my table...Slowly,mmm, dying? No one cares of it...
Where is he now? How is he? What's he doing? Did he find a place to live?..
I'm nervous, dammit!!!
Please, don't give in! You're strong!..
You can overcome all these things!..
I suppose, today I won't fall asleep again...
The heart is ready to get out from my body and to fall into small pieces...
I'm not nervous, I'm not nervous, I'm not nervous...
~~Shit, I am...~~

Mood: Awful!!!!
Music: Background
I want: To be sure, that everything is alright with him
Categories: Awful(((, Sleeplessness, [...Feelings amd emotions...], SOS!!!!

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~Candies~

no@spam.com (Seleny...Angel) — Sat, 27 Dec 2008 13:59:44 GMT

Hello, ladies and gentlemen!))) Yes, that�s right, finally, � holidays) And 14 hours of sleep) Yes!
Yesterday I decorated a Xmas tree and actually, that�s all!) Snow is slowly falling, bright lights in my room, nice music, and everything seems to be good. But the truth is that I don�t want this year to leave. Despite everything, it was the best one. So many unforgettable moments, emotions� And I�m so glad, that I can say this) I�m so glad, that all my friends are always near, no matter what can happen. I�m so happy, that I have those people, whom I love and who loves me� this is probably the best feeling in the world.
I don�t need any presents, �cause I�m really happy) My mentality has changed a lot and that�s good) Material things are nothing, in comparison with all our memories) And maybe sometimes I feel sad, but this is the main point of being a human being)))
New Year is coming and knocking in our doors,
I don�t need it at all, but nothing can stop it=)
So, I will open my door wide and hope, that the next year will be even better,
Than the last one)))

Mood: Niceeeeeee
Music: Lady Gaga
I want: Nothing)))
Categories: Future, Happy!, Holidays, My life, Somewhere only we know, [...Feelings amd emotions...]

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~Turn around~

no@spam.com (Seleny...Angel) — Sun, 21 Dec 2008 12:41:30 GMT

Well, here I am again� I haven�t been here for�2 weeks? Or even more� Ah, whatever!
Mm, feeling sad now� I miss my friend! Only 5 weeks left. Only?)
Xmas is coming, the last week of school and then holidays� Hm, the weather is wonderful! White and fluffy snow, that looked so primeval until the morning, until all people got out from their houses)
And every day is the same) You wake up in the morning to the song of Green Day �Wake me up, when September ends�), have a cup of coffee, put on your clothes and make-up, try to find your iPod, say �Bye� & �Have a nice day� to everybody in the house, then a loud music, people around you, speeding at their works, small kids and their parents and this is so cool) Adults don�t mention a young smiling girl, but their small children do, and they smile you in response)) And when you try to find smth tasty in your school bag, to feed a houseless puppy, but you already know, that there�s nothing there( And a normal school day, when you realize, that you and your friends are the only people, who take care of the holiday at school and try to do your best to organize it. When you decorate your class, when you�re singing songs, and laughing on your way home with your friend. When you write a small letter to you friend, that you love her a lot and you are so happy, that she is always by your side. When you downloaded children�s songs from the Internet, and started singing it out loud, lying on the bed and laughing with your best friend.
And you already know, that you have only one year to choose your life. To enter a university, to study� But what should you do, when you don�t know what you want to become?..
Hah, like always, a new game, try to understand smth from this text) I don�t envy people, who read my blog, �cause sometimes even I can�t understand it)

Mood: Mmmm
Music: Paramore - We're broken
I want: Nothing
Categories: Future, My thoughts..., Questions, Somewhere only we know

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Morning...

no@spam.com (Seleny...Angel) — Mon, 08 Dec 2008 11:13:55 GMT

What is it?.. A cup of still warm coffee, a wet snow outside my window, relaxing music without words and my heart, beating calm and quietly� Mmmm))) Sounds good) Especially, when I slept only, mmm, 6 hours. Yeah, right, 6 hours) My cat, lying on my knees�Ha! The only good side, of being ill, is that you have to take some anti-allergenic pills, which allows you to do all these things, that you couldn�t do earlier)
And this music� Like small rain-drops. But I hate rain� I love winter, because of snow, and summer, because of warmth))Two opposites� Hm, I�ve at once recollected the song by Roisin Murphy xDDDDDD �I�m a bitch, I�m a lover, I�m a child, I�m an adult��
Well, but it�s not the main topic of this note. Actually, it has no topic)) But if you�ll manage to find perhaps ONE topic in all notes in my blog, I�ll be, hm, a little bit shocked)))

Mood: Good, but feel a little bit bad)
Music: Alibi - onfession
I want: Massage 0=)
Categories: About nothing, My mood, Questions, Somewhere only we know

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Gimme some medicine, please!!!I can...

no@spam.com (Seleny...Angel) — Fri, 05 Dec 2008 18:22:20 GMT

Gimme some medicine, please!!!
I can't stand this pain any more!!!
It's too hard...
I can't talk... It's painfull to breathe...
Just an usual cold...But I can't keem myself from crying...Why?!..
So painful..
Away from my friends...Don't let them read this...Please!
Come on!
"Just Dance! Gonna be OK!"
Damm, please, give me medicine...
I can't be ill! I simply can't! I have a lot of things to do!!!
I can't let down my friends!!!
...
Mood: Awful
Music: Smth of TH... I don't know...
I want: Give me some medicine, plz...
Categories: Awful(((, [...Feelings amd emotions...], Forget it

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